My Newborn Has No Schedule

We are very blessed in that we have a huge community that is providing wonderful support to us as we figure out this parenting-thing! That means people bringing meals, helping around the house, good substitutes for my husband at work...and everyone wants to know before they stop by, when is a good time? This is a great question! It is considerate and appropriate! I love people who are both of those things!

But unfortunately, I have no answer.

I don't think that a 12-day old baby is supposed to have a schedule. It was my general impression that babies this young are still figuring out the world; they're still getting the hang of basic bodily functions, input and output, and aren't really ready to be part of the timed world. So any time I say could end up being a "bad" time - she could be nursing (which I've found makes some people uber-uncomfortable!), she could be sleeping (which then makes everyone sad because they wanted to hold her), or I could be in my pajamas (which means baby and I will be hiding in my room at the sound of the door bell).

This is my adorable child. ADORABLE. 

I have already received some advice on helping her get "on schedule." The greatest areas of scheduling for a newborn (since they're not popping out to do yogalates or anything) are sleeping and eating. And the top bit of sleep advice has been that I should swaddle her to help her sleep. And herein I reveal my horrific mothering: I hate swaddling. I do not know how Zuzu feels about it, having tried it a grand total of twice, but I hate it. Can I tell you why? Because it makes my child look like an amputee. It does. It frightens me! I think, oh my gosh, this is what she would look like with no arms!! Besides, her little hands and fingers are so sweet and kissable, why would I put them away? She doesn't have trouble sleeping - she just doesn't want to sleep in her bassinet...or anywhere besides on my chest, or right next to me. Which would be fine, except when she sleeps on me, I can't sleep, because I have nightmares about suffocating her (and she is a SQUIRMY and NOISY sleeper). And when I can't sleep, I turn into a basket case (for real - the other night I got like two seconds of sleep and cried the whole next day about basically nothing).

Look at that sassy hand - how could I restrict it?? It should be free - freeeeee! 

So as I am trying to get the hang of parenting, I am open to advice. If anyone wants to tell me the wonders of swaddling or how to co-sleep without blind terror taking over, I'm all ears. Because y'know, my newborn is just so unscheduled.