Friday, May 29, 2015

7QT: Reader Input Needed!

Quick Takes Friday!
In which I have some sincere questions and would love your input.

So yesterday, I finally got Zuzu settled on the couch (she's a horrible sick person), and David in the Boba, then got down to mopping my really gross kitchen floor (and the bedroom for good measure).  Since this is a good time to listen to something, I started listening to the Visitation Project podcast. To my surprise, I enjoyed it - surprise because I'm not really a podcast person. But I really felt the sincerity in their words and enjoyed hearing them speak - plus that line in the first one about encouraging walkers/runners, made me laugh really hard. If you're looking for something to listen to, check them out!

Still one of my favorite pictures - the sun coming in our back sliders in the morning is phenomenal.

In one of the moms groups I'm a part of, a gal posted an article about moms feeling touched out. Granted, the tone and verbage is a bit...hippy? me, but I appreciated the message. Too often mothers go to two extremes in dealing with our gut reactions to a parenting situation: either we power through, shoving down feelings we deem unacceptable, or give in to our first instinctual reaction. The article paints a helpful third way of considering our reactions and allowing them to inform, but not control, our parenting practices.

The article above is really helpful, especially since I'm tandem nursing right now (I realized I outed myself as a tandem nurser in a previous post). If I was going to start a new blog, I'd call it Confessions of an Accidental Tandem Nurser, because I really never thought I'd get to this point. Many mothers I've met have been so complimentary of me nursing Zuzu for so long and I've always protested that I'm just too lazy to wean. Well, I think I've now proven that - I really didn't want to deal with weaning and so now I'm dealing with nursing two kids at once. Which also proves that laziness is usually it's own punishment, since tandem nursing is NOT easier and is actually really annoying, for me, most of the time.

Any one have weaning advice for a much older toddler?

This June, we will be taking the kiddos to Disney for the first time. I'm beyond excited, since Disney was a huge part of my childhood, as I grew up in a suburb of Orlando and nearly all of my family has, at one point or another, worked for Disney. This might explain why I am NOT doing Disney at all like the amazing Kathryn Whitaker. I read her Disney posts and my head nearly explodes.
In all my years of going to Disney, never once have I done a character breakfast or planned out my fast passes or synched our Magic Bands or even taken nice pictures there. Disney to us was like the park down the street - you went often, sometimes just for the afternoon, and it was fun but not novel. I'm feeling sort of bad that I'm not making it the huge experience for Susannah that she'd have if she was coming from out of state, but then again, we probably couldn't afford it if we weren't staying with my parents and getting Florida resident rates!

Amelia's reflections on her cleaning style were sincerely fascinating to me, since I am the exact opposite. Without a cleaning schedule, my house is cleaned sporadically at best. What usually happens is once I have a few minutes without someone attached to my body, I just start frantically cleaning whatever is in front of me - then someone needs me so I walk away - then I forget what I was doing and start frantically cleaning some new area - repeat all day resulting in an entire house that's half-way messy. But if I have a list? Oh it GETS DONE because nothing excites me more than checking off those boxes next to my list.

Someone tweeted Jen Fulwiler's old blog post about her realization of what is ACTUALLY relaxing for her, which is not a day at the salon. I can really identify, because for so long after Zuzu was born I kept thinking I needed to get some time away from the baby to relax - isn't that what everyone says moms need? But in reality, I have to realize that I am NOT  a person who can relax away from my children right now. I feel more relaxed when they are close by, but we are in an environment where everyone can enjoy themselves freely, i.e. kids can be loud and messy, I can nurse comfortably. So for my birthday we ate at this dive on the beach - Zuzu could eat french fries and run around in the sand, nobody batted an eye at my nursing cleavage (because hello, there was a girl playing beach volleyball in a THONG 10 feet over), and there was plenty of beer for all the adults. That was way more relaxing than going out to a nice dinner or doing something away from the kids, where I'd just be worrying about how they were doing the whole time.

Tom has very generously gifted me with a blog redesign! I have hired a very talented designer (she did Jen's!) and am starting to gather ideas. Anybody have advice or any helpful posts out there on figuring out your design aesthetic? I am having a slight existential crisis, not unlike the one going on in my wardrobe AND my home. I think these are all connected. Choosing how to present myself visually - in my home, my wardrobe, my online presence - places me in the position of reconciling my love for two very distinct styles that I have always loved. Choosing one or the other makes me feel as if I am making a forever statement about who I am, but trying to embrace both usually results in visuals that are incongruous and not in harmony. Talk to me, design people: how do you choose a visual representation of yourself - or is it something you're not extremely concern about at all?

Ever realize how hard it is to find a picture of yourself? Baby Zuzu and I in 2013!


  1. Yay for a new blog design! How exciting! When I had my blog designed a few years ago, I felt like I was so vague. I gave her examples like: I like the simplicity of this blog...I like black, white and dusty blue...I like how this blog has sidebar buttons like this...etc etc. Somehow she worked miracles and I still love the design today! Hopefully you'll have the same experience!

    1. Yes, I'm trying to get examples from other blogs, but I feel like when I put all that stuff out there it won't look very put together!! But that's why I hired someone...she did Jen's blog and did a great job, plus my mom's, and I thought her work on both of those was great.
      I can't wait to get started!

  2. New blog exciting!

    Thanks for sharing my blog. :)

    Weaning...well Elsa is still nursing (and not close to weaning) but I have weaned a few others kids. And if I had a new baby, I would have pushed weaning on her a bit more, but I don't have a new baby and I'm lazy to wean.

    Anyway, as far as weaning goes, distraction, distraction, distraction. What I do, is decide how much nursing I can handle (usually its 1-2 times a day..maybe evening or morning) and then firmly resolved to NOT nurse any other time. I distract with lollipops, sippy cups, snacks, going outside It may be easier to just wean altogether and just distract, distract, distract. With the new baby, she is actually probably getting a significant amount of milk when she nurses, so that is why offering snacks and drinks instead is so helpful. People don't htink that a 2-year still gets some nutrition from nursing but they do, and especially since you have a new baby, there is probably lots of milk there. Also, lots of cuddling and reading and other thing to get that "togetherness". Hope this helps.

    1. Zuzu had paired down nursing, but then really upped it when David came (which is to be expected). I would okay if it was just naps and bedtime, but really, it's whenever she's bored, tired, frustrated, etc. And I'm getting pretty frustrated with it myself!

      I'm going to wait till we're a bit more settled in with the baby and then do it. Night weaning her was actually really easy, so here's hoping...

  3. Figuring out your design aesthetic is HARD! I just redesigned my blog (well, it's a work in progress and we'll see if it's ever finished) and basically just wanted it CLEAN. It was so cluttered and I purged a lot but now I feel like it's still not right... So basically I don't know! But I bet you can start with a color palette that you like and maybe look at different blogs that you like and figure out what you like about their designs?


Comments make me feel like I'm not just talking to myself or the government (because I know the government secretly reads my blog). Help me feel less crazy - comment away!