Tuesday, March 6, 2012

I am Waiting for a Child

That's what they call being pregnant in France - waiting for a child. And Tom and I, we are waiting for a child. We'll be waiting for about 33 more weeks. It seems like a long time at this point.

We've had some rough spots already: doctors concerned about my progesterone, etc. The prospect of weekly shots still lingers on the horizon, but for right now, baby seems to be doing just fine. We had the first sonogram on Monday and it showed a wee babe doing exactly what they should be, and a nice strong heartbeat. Tom got very excited, but I just started at the screen thinking "I swear the midwife is just pointing to another shadow...that doesn't look like anything, let alone a baby!!"

My wonderful in-laws come tomorrow, so I'll be excited to have new people around. I have had some "morning" sickness, so I feel like I don't get out as much as I used to - feeling a bit isolated. It'll be nice to have some company!

If you detect a lack of exclamation marks, not quite the jubilant air you'd expect one like me to have, forgive me, dear readers. I am waiting as best I can - through fear, and loneliness, and doubt. The days seem to stretch before me - an eternity until I can hold my child, be assured of his or her safety, really allow myself to believe that I am a mother. I know as time goes by, it'll be easier to be joyful...but right now I'm just waiting, as best I can.


  1. Congratulations, God is so good!

  2. Totally understand! I'm praying for your health and the health of your baby!!!! Very excited for your journey.

  3. I am very happy for you, Martha, and will pray for you that your time of waiting will become more confident and joyful.

  4. Thank you all for your well wishes!! I am grateful for the support - and so is baby :)

  5. Congratulations again Martha! I totally understand how you are feeling. I believe for me, the greatest suffering of pregnancy is having a child, someone who I love immensely already, that I can't see and have no idea if they are healthy (or even alive in the beginning before feeling movement). I've always said I would find pregnancy a lot easier if I had a window to the womb, where I could just peak in and make sure the baby is okay. It DOES get much easier once your little one makes their presence known, but even then I am still have a lot of anxiety. Anyway, we'll pray for you and your baby.

  6. Congratulations :) absolutely understand your trepidation too. I suffered a miscarriage before having my little boy and hence the 2 subsequent pregnancies have been full of fear especially in the first trimester. Once you're in the second and can feel baby moving all the time it's LOVELY. I'm nearly 31 weeks now and the time does slip away so fast, so try to enjoy it as best you can :)

  7. :0D

    How did I miss this post!

    I've been praying and praying and checking your blog and somehow I missed it!!!!!! I must be blind! Congratulations!!!!!


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